Manchester United To Sign 'Everyone'

Manchester United Football Club are in the running to sign Karim Benzema, Lionel Messi and Fernando Torres !! Ooops, I forgot David Villa too.

Despite having Wayne Rooney, Carlos Tevez, Dimitar Berbatov and Cristiano Ronaldo at their disposal, the Reds will join Barcelona and Real Madrid in the hunt for the £35million-rated Lyon striker. Well that's the latest of a long string of reports I have read today anyway. I find it amazing that anyone would think Fergie would even consider deals such as this. It's not like £140m grows on trees to just snap these guys up. Then there would be the small problem of putting six of these eight superstars on the bench every game and they wont put up with that.

Benzema's agent Karim Djaziri is at the centre of all the rumours anyway, pimping his guy round Europe to wring every penny out of a possible deal ! The scourge of football is what these agents are, they should be shot !!

“Barcelona, Real Madrid and Manchester United are not the only clubs following Karim because all the big European clubs are,” he told France-Football. Our contacts with the clubs are constant and our contacts did not start last year but since Karim is 16! But we are transparent with Lyon on every point and they are aware of everything happening.” .....Back To Home Page

No, No, No .... Not Liverpool !!!

Having spent the summer making his demands and hiding what he was up to, many United fans have voiced their lack of respect for The Slave - Cristiano Ronaldo !!

The fact is though, it seems without him United are quite an ordinary and lack lustre team if I'm honest. We managed to get beaten by Liverpool and lose Nemanja Vidic for the trip to Stamford Bridge to boot. Given the fact Chelski haven't been beaten there for about 300 years it's not looking too favourable right now.

A Wes Brown own goal and late strike from Ryan Babel cancelled out Carlos Tevez's third minute opener to hand Liverpool their first league victory over United for four years !!

United were out-fought and out-thought by a Liverpool team without both Steven Gerrard and Fernando Torres. As well as missing Vidic next week it seems entirely probable the injured Carrick is now set to miss the trip to Chelsea next Sunday as well.

Thankfully Ronaldo, who has yet to play for United since openly courting his move to Real Madrid, is on course to return against Chelsea after two months on the sidelines following ankle surgery.

"Ronaldo is training now, he's with the first team and he's aiming to be a substitute at Chelsea on September 21. He's come on leaps and bounds,” Ferguson said.

"I think we mentioned a couple of weeks ago he was making rapid progress in terms of overcoming the injury problem he had and the training he's been doing with the physios and Tony Strudwick the fitness coach.

“He's been making great strides in the direction towards first-team football."

United sorely need the 23-year-old to return following their pale display at Anfield that leaves them facing problems in their bid to retain the league title.

Ferguson did actually admit that his team's performance was way below expectations.

“When you score after three minutes, you should be consolidating that, but we never won a tackle and you have to hand it to Liverpool," he said.

“When you have bad days, the big thing is to get something from them, but we conceded two goals that were absolute shockers. People will say that it is some Conference team defending when they see us on television. It was shocking stuff.

“The first was a really scabby goal to lose. Liverpool have had a bit of fortune with both goals, but they have deserved their luck, you can't deny that.

They won every tackle and we just didn't respond to it. With our great record here, Liverpool raised their game an extra level."

Vidic's sending off for two bookings rules him out of the Chelsea clash and Carrick is now set to miss both the Champions League meeting with Villarreal and the trip to Stamford Bridge after damaging his ankle against Liverpool.

Arbeloa The Comedian

Alvaro Arbeloa insists Liverpool can still beat Manchester United
without Steven Gerrard or Fernando Torres.

The two best players they have and he thinks his team can take
on Europes best without them !!!

That either makes him extremely stupid and ill informed or just
arrogant and big headed !!

Gerrard is recovering from groin surgery, while striker Torres is
struggling with a hamstring strain.

The funniest bit was when he told the Liverpool web site:

"'Fernando and Stevie are really important for us and they are
probably our best players. But we have a really good squad and
know we have other really good players too. We can still beat
Manchester United without Fernando and Stevie. 'It will be a
hard game for us, but it will also be tough for them. Their
defenders have to play against players like Yossi
Benayoun, Dirk Kuyt and Robbie Keane. We now have
people like Robbie Keane, who is a really good player,

and Albert Riera too.'

Fernando Torres, Alexis Sanchez, Carlos Tevez.

Not much going on today. Well unless Berba got
out of bed at about 5am and shot up to Old
Trafford to sign for United !!

Some more Spanish bull's excrement !!

Having sold Ronaldhino to Milan and the
imminent sale of Eto'o, Barca are now keen to
sign a big name striker. El Mundo Deportivo
claims they are looking at Liverpool's Fernando
Torres and our very own Carlos Tevez !!!



It seems to me these Spanish newspapers struggle for news and now participate in a new
game, 'Fantasy Reporting'...

Alexis Sanchez. Who ? (Pictured above) He is a young Chilean attacker that United have been
eyeing as a possible replacement for Ronaldo in the long term.

Currently playing for Udinese, United actually made a move for him 2 months ago. They tabled
an offer which was turned down by both Alexis and his agent Fernando Felicevich. The offer
didn't impress Udinese much either.

Felicevich said "The figure Udinese turned down is very important !" Interesting !

Probably 50 quid and a Tom-Tom sat nav if Gill had anything to do with it !!!